MeOW Raena, me’s not sure we oughtta go eat yet. Don’t you sense something’s up?
I’s do sissy, but I’s hungry. I’s know mommy was tryin’ to do some hurried cleanin’ last night. I’s don’t know why she’d hurry like that. Doesn’t she know by now she passes out more when she hurries than when she takes her time? And, she’s in the middle of some of that de-clutterin’ and has stuffs every where.
That’s what me’s meowin’ ‘bout Raena. She only does things like that when she doesn’t get purropurr notice fur inspections, but can’t be sure that it’s not the government that’s comin’ ‘stead of the ‘pawrtment manager.
I’s don’t know why she bothers. Doesn’t she always say the law says they have to give her at least 24 hours notice befur such things? Surely she won’t let ‘em in ifn we’re eatin’ our brekky?.
Ya’ never know what mommy’s gonna do Raena. Me thinks we oughtta wait and see befur stickin’ our faces in our plates and chowin’ down. Hey, did you see that show mommy watched last night ‘bout those peeps marryin’ total strangers?
Hmmmpht That’s nuffin’. Did you see that she was gonna apply to be on the show and marry her own stranger? ‘Pawrently they’re gonna be filmin’ in Dallas soon. Ifin she hadn’t been too old, we could’a had one of those daddy’s some of our furiends have.
He would’a been a stranger, Raena. What ifin he didn’t like kitties? It’s not like mommy would’a been able to purr-screen him and find out ahead of time.
Thought you might enjoy seein’ mine’s belly stretch.
Mommy said there was a spot fur deal breakers on the application, sissy. I’s sure she would’a said he had to luvs us and purrvide fur us in the manner befittin’ queens and empresses.
Hmmmmm You’re right ‘bout that. Are you sure mommy’s too old? What’s that she’s always sayin’ ‘bout it bein’ rude to ask a woman’s age? Did you get the address of that website. Maybe we can still get mommy approved. On a good day with her make up on and her hair fixed mommy can still pass fur someone in her late 30’s, early 40’s.
Mommy says I’s have the cutest belly ever. What do you think?
Yeah, but that’s still too old sissy.
Y, That’s discrimination, Raena. Me’s sure there’s lots of old folks out there that would like to have their own stranger to marry. Me’s sure mommy isn’t the only one. We’ll just fudge her age a bit. One she’s married, it’ll be too late to back out. (Dezi snickers deviously) And, we’d get to move. That’d mean no more surpurrise inspections.
I’s not so sure that’s a good idea, sissy. You know mommy hates lyin’. While she might not wanna admit to how old she is, I’s purretty sure anythin’ that starts with a lie can’t end up good.
Whatever. Me’s gettin’ hungry. Ya’ think we oughtta go try to sneak a few bites?
Hey, is anypawdy out there? It’s me, RaenaBelle. (Dezi and Raena pace in the living room waiting for mommy to put down the breakfast plates. Suddenly they hear the roar of the lawn crew. They look at each other and Dezi runs down the hall toward the bedroom. Raena runs behind her and then stops. She remembers passing mommy on all fours heading for the living room with her breakfast and turns back towards mommy. Just as she reaches mommy and starts to rub against her there’s a knock at the door. Raena steps slightly forward, looks out the slightly ajar door and hisses. Mommy, still on all fours with breakfast plates on her back, gently says)
It’s just the manager and bug man honey. They’re here for inspections and exterminations. (As mommy tries to get to the door without dropping the breakfast plates from her back, she contemplates how she’s going to open the door. Raena walks slowly beside mommy, rubbing against her occasionally. When mommy finally gets to the door, nobody’s there, and she feels a sense of relief. Mommy and Raena butt heads as they head to the living room. The noise of the lawn crew wanes as they move to the other side of the property and Dezi runs up and rubs against mommy. Breakfast plates down and mommy in her sittin’ chair, Dezi and Raena begin to eat.)
Sissy? Why do we always run when the lawn crew shows up? You know we’re s’posed to be helpin’ mommy. Besides, they’re just noisy. They can’t actually hurt us.
(Dezi stops and nonchalantly scratches her ear) Me doesn’t know why you run Raena. Me is helpin’ mommy. Me’s checkin’ fur those pesky intruders that scare her. You know, the last thing we’d want is fur mommy to get scared with our brekky plates. Now that wouldn’t be purretty. Anyways…(Suddenly, the lawn crew’s back, right outside the door and a rock hits the window, and then another and another; till Dezi runs off back down the hall. Raena sits and looks bewildered at first and then runs to the hall and into Dezi)
Oh, hey sissy, wha’ch’a doin’? (Raena stops and rubs her eyes)
Me heard mommy on the fone yesfurday Raena. Seems you’re goin’ to the V E T tomorrow. Ya’ better remind her to put the camera in her purrse tonight, or she’ll furget it tomorrow. Altho’ she might oughtta check the battery furst.
That’s okay sissy. I’s sure hope they can do somethin’ to help mine’s eyes. I’s know mommy doesn’t want me to be on antibiotics and steroids fur a long time, and quite furankly, I’s don’t like havin’ those drops put in mine’s eyes; but, they do seem to help clear everythin’ up. I’s know mommy had wanted to take me to a new V E T. But she says, we can charge mine’s visit with the old one, and we just don’t have any green papers right now. She said mine’s eyes just can’t wait any longer, she just hates to see me hurtin’. We’re so blest to have a mommy that loves us so much. As fur the camera, why can’t you help me remind her. Ya’ know, the more naggin’ the better. MOL
Sure ‘nuff Raena. Me sure hopes they can help ya’. Maybe ya’ll can go back to the store and get me a birthday surpurrise.
What ifin mommy already got you one, sissy? We’ve got a big box in the hallway to review that mommy says is gonna be your birthday surpurrise. Seems that should be enuff. (Hearing muffled talking outside Raena runs to the perch to look outside) Hey sissy, do you think we have a new neighbor already?
Me has no idea Raena. It was crazy. The day the new old neighbors moved out and turned in their keys, some lady moved a bed in there and hasn’t left since. She also hasn’t moved anythin’ else in. Can you ‘magine livin’ there with just a bed? And what’s she eatin’? And wearin’ fur that matter? Strange, me tells ya’, it’s just strange.
Yeah sissy, it’s fur sure strange. Guess we’ll just have to wait and see what happens. Maybe she moved here from somwhere far away and her stuffs comin’ in one of those big trucks or somethin’. Anyways, let’s go finish eatin’ and play. I’s’ll be there after I’s ask everypawdy to purray fur me and mommy and our trip to the V E T tomorrow.
Meowllo everypawdy. We do hope you’re havin’ a good week. We’re still waitin’ fur things to calm down so we can get back to normal ‘round here. Me told ya’ dat mommy and me was gonna have a Dezi and mommy day out Monday since it was time fur her monthly doctor’s ‘pointment, but we also thought we’d be back to visitin’ on Tuesday. So much fur da bestest laid plans. When we got home Monday we found a notice on our door ‘bout an inspection today, Wednesday. And it was gonna be one of those every box checked inspections: Cleanliness, Check Smoke Alarms, Change Filters, Extermination and Occupied Dwelling. Now most of ya’ looked at dat list and said, “What in the world?” We know, cuz we do too.
Da manager used to try to pull all this off at 7:30 – 8:00 a.m., and she would write mommy up cuz she couldn’t get to da door. So a few years ago when we was havin’ all this trouble with da manager, da lawyer asked fur an accommodation dat would require them to wait till at least 10:00 a.m. to do these inspections. Mommy’s not at full function by then, but she can usually let somepawdy in da door. Well this of course made da manager mad, but all da other residents was happy. Nopawdy wanted their brekky interrupted by alarms goin’ off and bug spray everywhere. And me does mean everywhere. After da exterminator leaves everypawdy has to mop and re-clean. He just walks through sprayin’ at everythin’, includin’ things like coffee pots, ceilings, and we’ve heard a teevee or two. Anyways, da notice meant dat mommy would have to spend all day yesfurday gettin’ ready.
Yeah, yeah, me knows, you’re wonderin’ what happened to our ‘round da house helper dat mommy had gotten da okay to hire. Well let me see, where to begin…(Dezi thinks to herself for a minute)Well ‘bout a month ago now, mommy actually had 2 different peeps show up and apply fur da job. Mommy innerviewed both and liked ‘em both ‘bout da same. One was a younger stay at home mommy dat just wanted extra money and to get outta da house (this job would be purrfect fur somepawdy like dat). Da other, was a widow dat needed money to live. She’s workin’ fur several others cleanin’ their houses and bein’ paid cash (under da table money). Mommy made certain dat they both unnerstood they would be getting’ paid by da State of Oklahoma, and it would be a check with taxes taken out and everythin’. Both said dat was fine. So mommy sent their applications off to be approved. A couple weeks later mommy was told da younger of da two had been approved and they were still workin’ on da other.
So mommy called da girly to offer her da job. She even came fur her furst day. When she left, she said she’d be back tomorrow (her second day of work). Well tomorrow came and went and no girly. WTC (What The Cat) So mommy checked with da State lady and found out da other applicant had been approved too. So mommy called her to offer her da job. Her reply was no surprise to mommy, but it was aggravatin’. See, even tho’ da State is payin’ fur this, there’s a budget dat mommy has to follow. And outta dat budget, mommy has to pay da cost fur those background checks. So ifin a purrson doesn’t take da job, we’ve already spent money on them, and there’s only so many background checks mommy can have purr da budget. Anyways, she told mommy dat she really needed to be paid in cash, cuz she didn’t wanna lose her welfare. Yep, there’s somethin’ really wrong with our system, and peeps. But alas, we have no ‘round da house help…still.
Now let’s get back to dat inspection. Mommy did what she does and killed herself cleanin’ up and then da manger showed up at our ‘partment this meownin’ at 8:30 a.m.. She should be refreshed on da rules, since we just renewed our lease and went over da exceptions mommy has. Ya’ know dat 10 o’clock time frame. Well mommy just hollered dat she couldn’t walk and Raena and me gave da nasty manager da ole hiss of disapproval, and da manager went on her way. She knew she couldn’t push mommy or write her up, cuz she was breakin’ our lease. Dat exception is based on mommy’s disability cuz she can’t move early in da meownin’. So it turns out, mommy wasted yesfurday getting’ ready fur nuffin’. Oh yeah, a lot of ya’ are wonderin’ what Occupied Dwelling means, right? It just means dat da only peeps livin’ there are on da lease. We have a few peeps out here dat have peeps livin’ with them dat aren’t on da lease, but da manager lets them get away with it. Ifin it was us tho’, we’d be in all kinds of hot water. and me doesn’t mean a hot tub.
Me really doesn’t care, cuz me’s still walkin’ on clouds from me’s day out with mommy. Me had her all to meself and it was pawsum. Me meowed to mommy dat we were gonna have to do more of these now dat Raena lives with us. And mommy purromissed we would. Me so luvs spendin’ time with mommy. We went to da doctor’s office and then da farmacy. And da town where our farmacy is has a brand new Dollar General, so mommy decided to take me there. It’s really nice and clean; ‘course it’s new. MOL Then we went to da pawrk fur a few minutes befur returnin’ home. What a day. Me’s gonna wrap it up now and see ‘boiut getting’ some of those treats mommy and sis Raena brought home da other day.
Well here we are half way thru another week. It’s been really hot here, so we’ve all been tryin’ to just chill out and stay cool. ‘Course da manager’s finally back on da purropurrty workin’ on our lease re-certification and buggin’ da dickens outta mommy. She was down here twice yesfurday wantin’ more stuffs. And then at some point she was here again leavin’ a notice on our door ‘bout this months inspection. Only we ain’t havin’ just one inspection this month, they’re tryin’ to slip in 3. Yep, they wanna intrude in our houses 3 times this month.
Da lease and da Landlord Tenant Act allows fur one inspection a month. But this management company likes to push da limits. And since most of da residents have been bullied fur so long, no one stands up to them and holds them to da law. So it looks like mommy’s gonna be really busy this month too. Da furst of those 3 inspections is tomorrow, and Raena has every toy we own pulled outta da toy basket and strewn all over da floor. And since we haven’t found anypawdy to help mommy ‘round da house, then all da clean up falls to her. These are da times mommy wishes we could vacuum and mop. Alas, no thumbs mommy.
But Dezi, I saw a kitty on da catputer vacuumin’ da other day. Sure ‘nuff, dat kitty was sittin’ on top of a round machine goin’ from room to room cleanin’ da floors.
Yes Raena they make these little robots dat clean da floor all by themselves. Dat kitty wasn’t vacuuming, he was goin’ along fur da ride. And besides. those machines cost a lot of money.
Well whatever Dezi, we need one of those.
Dat would be great Raena, but me told you they cost a lot of green papers dat we don’t have.
Well let’s make mommy some Dezi. I saw some colors ‘round here da other day.
(Dezi sighs and shakes her head)
Oh Raena, it doesn’t work dat way. It would be nice ifin it did; but it doesn’t. But me can tell ya’ one thing you can do to help mommy.
Really sissy? What is it? I would luvs to help mommy.
You can pick up all these toys you drug outta da toy box and put ‘em back. And next time only pull out da toy ya’ wanna play with right then. and when you’re finished playin’ or want a different toy, then put da old one back.
Uhhhhh (Raena sits still for a minute as she thinks)
But Dezi, dat doesn’t sound like fun. With all da toys in da floor, I can play with several at da same time.
But me thought you wanted to help mommy?
Dat’s okay sissy, I’s will find another way.
Yeah Raena, me thought so. Anyways, looks like mommy isn’t gonna have a lot of time to help us visit fur a day or two and then Raena has to go back to da VET on Furiday, so our week is gonna be full. We’ll be ‘round to visit as we can.
Now me also wants to remind you all ‘bout our Palympics event, Fly Fishin’. There’s still time to get your fotos in to us. And, all those who enter will get a pawsum badge created by Ann over at Zoolatry. We sure do purrectiate her and all she does fur da blogosphere. Check out da badge you’ll get.
Ifin ya have questions ‘bout da fly fishin’ event, check out our posty here. While there, you can also click over and check out all da events dat are still open. We’s gonna wrap it up now so mommy can get ready fur tomorrow’s inspection. We’re also getting’ some great questions fur our next Service Cat posty. And we were honored to be featured yesfurday on Jeanne Foguths blog bringin’ attention to Service Cats. Ifin ya missed it, check it out here.