WooHoo it’s Furiday!!! Me thought it would never get here. Now me knows you’re thinkin’ me’s excited cuz it’s da end of da week and da beginnin’ of da weekend, right? Me’s a cat, so what does me know ‘bout weeks and weekends really? Me only knows what mommy tells me; so me knows most of da world luvs Furiday. But dat’s not why me’s so excited. As you know it’s been stormin’ here fur so long me thinks me should grow some gills and fins. You know Dougie would feel right at home outside in our garden. Betta fish in da wild are often found in rice paddies or flood plains. And a flood plain is fur sure what we got goin’ on; so Dougie would be just fine out in da garden. Anyways, me’s getting’ off track. Me was gonna tell ya’ why me’s so happy it’s finally Furiday.
Well mommy and me was checkin’ da weather report and you know what da weather guesser said? You know ya’ can’t really trust ‘em, cuz after all, they’re only right about 20% of da time. Did you know weather guessers go to school to learn how to guess what da weather’s gonna do? Y, mommy didn’t need any weather schoolin’ at all, and she can always tell ya’ when it’s gonna rain or storm. Mommy says her knee’s been purrdictin’ da weather fur over 30 years. Notice me respected mommy’s 35 and holdin’ age lie?. MOL Anyways, mommy injured her knee years ago when she was young and says dat ole man Arfur-Itis tells her exactly when it’s gonna rain. And after her accident, she says her whole body is in tune with da weather. So me doesn’t know ‘zactly what those weather guessers learn at school, but it ain’t nearly as reliable as mommy’s knee and ole man Arfur-Itis.
Now, where was me? Oh yeah, me was tellin’ ya’ what da weather guesser said. He said dat only one more day of storms and we would have a whole week of mr. Sunshine. Dat’s right, mr. Sunshine was gonna be showin’ his smilin’ face ‘round here on Sunday and last fur days. Such welcome news, me’s gonna give him da benefit of da doubt and believe him this time. Me can’t wait, so he better be right. Or maybe me should consult mommys knee. Course, it’s time fur us to recertify our lease so mommy claims she’s gonna be really busy this month.
As a matter of fact, we took da day off Fursday and mommy worked so hard on da house dat she was pourin’ sweat. She looked like she had been standin’ outside in da storms. Me doesn’t know why she thinks she needs to tear da house up, but she says it’s…time. Time? What does she mean…Time? Time fur what? Oh don’t worry, you know me. Me will tell you all as soon as me figgers out what she’s talkin’ ‘bout. Me can’t keep a secret from me’s furiends. Maybe dat’s why mommy won’t tell me her age, ya think?
In da meantime, mommy was so purroud of me fur offurin’ to help her with da carpet monster.
No, self purrpelled or not, me can’t actually push dat thing ‘round, but…me didn’t run away and hide from it like me used to. And let me tell ya’ dat thing will almost run itself. Dat’s why mommy bought it all those years ago. She needed somethin’ light weight dat didn’t take a 100 pounds to push. Ya’ know she passes out, a lot, and so anytime she can get help with somethin’ like dat, she takes it. And let me tell ya’ another thing, it’s pawsum at pickin’ up those litter pieces of scattered litter and all dat shed pet furs. Now we ain’t bein’ paid by da Shark peeps, so this ain’t no sponsored posty or commercial; but we know a lot of ya’ are often lookin’ fur good carpet monsters, so me just thought me’d tell ya’, this is a good one. Now was dat a run on sentence or what? MOL Anyways, where was me? Oh yeah, purroud mommy. Me hung in there close to da action and mommy, dat she called me her Girl Furiday…whatever dat is. You know it doesn’t take much to make mommies and daddies purroud, fank catness. So, we have lots to do mommy says, so we will be by to visit with ya’ll as soon as we can.
What’s dat mommy? You want me to move so you can get all da furs off da cat tree? Let me think ’bout it, okay?