So da last twainin’ posty had me runnin’ us into da chest of drawers. Which, by da way, has their ever been a better name fur sumfin’? You know weez have fings called dwessers, and vanity’s and so on. But dat dwesser dusn’t dwess mommy or us. And meez not weally know ifin da vaity be vain or not, but a chest of drawers is zactly what it is. Wight? Who names these fings, dat’s what me wants to know. You fink meez getting’ off da subject don’t ya’? Well ifin fings had more purropwiate names then maybe me wuld unnewstand when mommy sez fings like, “Dezi, slow down, you’re gunna run into the vanity.” Or, “Hold on Dezi, We’re headin’ for the dresser fast.” How was me posed to know mommy didn’t wanna go to da dwesser after goin’ to da pawdee box room? Seems to me she wuld wanna get dwessed. After all you hoomans sure do like to cover everyfin’ up.
So anyways, sissy took over da dwivin’ again dat day and meez lesson was over. Me walked wound dat chair a few times dat day lookin’ it over and finkin’ ‘bout it. Pawently whacky paw dwivin’ ain’t da way to go. Sure meez head was up so me kuld see everyfin’, but dat wasn’t necessarily a good fing. Me finks to meez selff dat maybe me oughtta just let sissy do da dwivin’ of da movin’ chair. Meez weallly good at answerin’ da fone and da door, and sissy be gweat at dwivin’. So maybe we can’t all be good at everyfin’. Me even meowed to sissy ‘bout it later dat day. Sissy meowed to me dat me was just gunna have to take it slow and easy, but dat me had to learn to dwive da movin’ chair. So da next meownin’ when we all woke up and got mommy to da chair me laid back down and sissy went ahead and dwove mommy to da pawdee box room. Me fawt me had escaped a lesson in dwivin’. But ever patient mommy wasn’t finished wiff me yet.
After bwekky mommy busied hers selff at da movin’ chair. Me kuldn’t see zactly what she was duin’, but she had a bottle of sum sort and was spwayin’ dat joystick. When she finished she called me over to her and sat down in da movin’ chair. Me can’t wesist a little luvvin’ so me sauntered over to mommy and sis Lexi took up hers post to watch whatever events unfolded. Mommy sez meez a pwissy butt and wiggles when me walks. Da sign of a twue Suddern Belle. Maybe dat’s why meez middle name is Izabella. Me reached mommy and rubbed hers leg. Me wasn’t weal sure me wanted to get back into dat chair after runnin’ into da chest of drawers da day afur. Mommy reached down and picked me up and sat me in hers lap. And suddenly meez nose went up in da air and meez mouff opened and me stawrted duin’ da flemmin’. Yous know, takin’ in da smell weal good. Yous seen kitties duin’ it afur. Openin’ our mouffs enables us to weally take in da scent. And let me tell ya’, there was a gweat smell comin’ fwum da joystick awea of da movin’ chair.
It enticed me to stawt rubbin’ against da joystick. Me even gave it a lick or two. Mommy had spwayed da joystick wiff nip spway. See she knew dat whacky paw dwivin’ wasn’t gunna work eever, and so she hoped by spwayin’ da joystick wiff catnip me wuld wanna bite it again. And she was wight. It took a while cuz me also wanted to rub it, but mommy gently pushed meez head a few times and me finally gave in and bit down on da joystick. Altho’ da furst push or two me gave mommy a little “grrrrrrrrr” Me has a little fake growl dat me uses sumtimes and dat’s what me did when mommy twied to get me to immediately bite down. Course all dat nip made me feel a little feisty. MOL Well after me bit down mommy twied to reach over meez head and turn on da chair. We was back in da bedroom and she had furgot to turn on da light so she kuldn’t see very good and fur sum weason she sez she can’t see fwu all meez fur. So she stawrted pushin’ down on buttons twyin’ to hit da power button.
She finally heard da beep dat signaled da movin’ chair was on, and she gently pushed meez head. We was pointeed wight at da pawdee box room so all we had to do was go stwaight. Afur callin’ me to her mommy had turned da speed down so she fawt we wuld slowly inch to da pawdee box room. What she didn’t know is dat while she was puttin’ da spway bottle of nip away sis Lexi had used da chair to get up on da bed to watch, and when she jumped up she had turned da chair on and off again and also turned da speed up. It’s way to easy to turn da speed up. All ya’ gotta do is just push da button. Mommy sez hers furst chair had a turn knob fur speed and wasn’t as easy to change. Not dat sissy and Lucky hadn’t figgered it out, it just took a little longer.
Anyways, me was soakin’ up all da pawsum nip fwum dat joystick when mommy gently pushed meez head. Again we jutted furward and meez mouff still bitin’ da joystick turned meez head to look fur sissy and da whole chair turned wiff me. Mommy stawrted hollerin’, “Dezi, let go, we’re gunna run into the dresser.” Me jerked meez head back wound to look at mommy wiff da bitey still on da joystick and weez turned even more. And afur me knew it we hit da bed and me was frown jumped onto da bed next to Lexi. Me shook like a dog getting’ outta a baff, and bounded toward da chair and mommy. Mommy was sittin’ there laffin’ so hawrd she was cwyin’ and sissy kuldn’t get off da bed and down da hall fast enuff. Me got to mommy and put da bitey on da awrm of dat movin’ chair. Me was gunna punish it fur hurtin’ mommy. Mommy seemed to laff even hawrder and sed, “It’s okay sweety, we’re fine. You’ll get it. It’s just gunna take a while longer.” We had a little luv fest and sissy came back and got back on da bed. While pettin’ me and sweet talkin’ me, mommy turned da chair wound so it was facin’ da pawdee box rom again. Me looked up and fawt, Oh me cats and kittens, anudder lesson alweady?
Weez havin’ stowrms and mommy’s a little unnew da wevver, so weez’ll visit as much as we can. See ya’ soon. As fur me and sissy meowin’ ’bout fings, mommy be puttin’ conversations to actions/innewactions she sees and saw. Obviously she dusn’t twuly know what me and sis Lexi actually sed. So it is pawsible dat da conversation dat me and sissy had is entirely fiction. But dat be da only pawrt of meez twainin’ stories dat awe.
Till da next time………………….Be Blest!!!